There are many ways to watch the Oscars, or as I call it, "The Gay Men's Superbowl."

With good friends, alone, at a big party, or preferably, from the front row, waiting for them to call your name. While I have not yet had the pleasure of doing the latter, I have done quite a few of the former. And I even once went to the dress rehearsals the day before, so I'm getting there. But no matter where or how I watch it, I have a few rituals. One is to eat a whole lot of crap, giving myself an "Oscar belly" for quite some time and the other is to see every movie I possibly can beforehand so I can understand it.

My love of the Oscars probably started when, growing up on the East Coast, my mother allowed me to stay up all the way till 12 or 1 am that one night of the year. I wrote it off and knew that the next day at school I'd feel as horribly as I do now, at 40-something, staying up past 10 pm. :) It was all for the good of the Oscars. And boy were they good. The 1970 and 80's Oscars were quite a show. There were big, tacky, expensive musical numbers and looking back I can't believe how we loved those styles of clothes. If you're not sure what I'm talking about, watch any episode of The Partridge Family.

Back then I also wanted to be an actress. I am sure many of us have practiced our Oscar speeches, and based on the year or who I was mad at, my speeches always thanked some, and made sure certain people were jealous with envy.

When I switched over to writing and started teaching at Compton High, things changed. I changed. I wanted to win that Oscar so that the kids I taught would see someone they had once known, up there, telling them that anything is possible. That Oscar winners, famous people and stars weren't "them" but were us. Could be all of us. That anyone could be a success. And whether the girl from "Precious" won or not, I think she did a good job of demonstrating that tonight, as did Monique.

I enjoyed tonight's broadcast. I ate my crap, had my loved ones around me- the kind who love the show as much as I do but do not talk incessantly - we bet and balloted and laughed and were moved. And that's what the Oscars have always done for me.

Sure, it's not a huge, deep, meaningful event. Sure there are wonderful superficialities, and nothing is better than the hosts pointing that out, but it's still a night of fun and magic. I love the opening songs and monologues. The clips to remind me of what I saw or inspire me of what to see next. I love to see writers honored or people tell us who touched them. Tonight I loved seeing the hosts in snuggies, Monique's speech, the Memorium. I always love to see James Taylor. I loved this year, that they made us care more about subjects like short films- by showing us clips or people whose careers were made because of winning this category.

I guess I like this show because it is about my favorite thing- dreams. And as people on this show achieve theirs, I look in their eyes. I want to know how they got there. Their dreams are no better than the dreams everyone has- of green technology, politics, world peace, teaching, finding cures for diseases, empowering people - it's just a televised moment where I can watch people who have achieved their dreams and then reboot my ambitions and the dreams and ambition of everyone I come in contact with.

The Academy Awards have brought us laughter and tears, fanfare and dance, dazzling dresses, streakers, homages to people who have entertained us over the years. The people aren't better, they may just be shinier. But they are examples to me of people who open their hearts for us and help us open our own. So I enjoy it.

And this year, in the reverse of election '08, Hilary beat Obama for best director. I thought they'd mention that.

Thanks for the escape - people who make movies, thanks for the night of escape and magic- people who make the Oscars, and thank you most of all, people at Ralph's supermarket, who make those powdered sugar brownie bites- I think we went through the whole batch.